Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Jason Mraz and the Battle Hymn of the Hospital Mom

So I made an effort to end the summer on an absolute personal high note by driving a ridiculous number of hours to go see one of my favorite singer/performers: Mr. Jason Mraz.

 After months of petitioning friends and pestering pals to go to the concert in Detroit from Traverse City, I found a taker. Remember Bernie's friend, Hattie Jo? Well,  Hattie Jo's mom, Jen, and I made the trek. Another trip to the Detroit area? In the summer?  Most in the north find that a preposterous idea. After all, we do live in the most beautiful place in America and to leave to go downstate is somewhat blasphemous, especially if you're not going to visit family or attend a majorly personal event. Didn't matter.


We were going. And while our kiddos find great satisfaction in hanging out together, so do we.



So what the heck does a Jason Mraz concert have to do with Bernie and life with a kid with Down syndrome and all of the other subsequent issues? Quite a bit actually and not really at all what I was thinking in initially making plans for the trip. First of all, moms who have kids with Down syndrome have a great outlook and get out to do some pretty cool things. We have friends everywhere. Worlds again ended up colliding as high school pals, Black River pals, Traverse City pals, new friends, and even a Mott employee or two came together to listen to the joyful musical wisdom of Mr. Mraz in Detroit at the end of August.



It's no secret amongst parents of kids with Down syndrome that, contrary to the name itself, these kiddos have the propensity to help us find incredible joy in the world beyond that of our more typical children once you get over the shock that so many seem to get stuck in. They are immensely capable of reminding us of the simple, small stuff that really matters.



And the music of Jason Mraz is in the same light. His music is positive, well written, composed to include a range of styles and vocal skills, sometimes has a shock or two to make you think or giggle, and leaves you with your toes tapping and your voice singing along.  You leave at the end of the concert wondering what the heck could really have been wrong in the first place and with a greater appreciation of everyone and everything around you.  If you're not smiling when you leave, then you need to just go see him or listen to him more often. Kind of reminds me of Bernie. As my dad says, "If she can't make you smile and melt your heart, then there's something wrong with you." I have to say I agree...

For those of you who are not super Mraz fans like Jen and I, this tour was to celebrate Jason's lastest "Love is a Four Letter Word" album.  We even bought Jason a Michigan Love t-shirt to give to him at the concert (click here for the M-22 store to order. You will not see these shirts on sale online yet for some reason, but maybe this article in the Wall Street Journal about them may help you know why). Thanks to the guys at the M-22 store for the discount and enthusiasm for our plan to give Jason this shirt. We both agreed to put on the capes of our less inhibited and bolder inner 18-year-olds and come hell or high water, we were going to get this shirt to him on stage.

The couple who took our picture with the shirt before the concert seemed to think we were a little crazy and disillusioned in thinking we were going to hand deliver this shirt to him during the show. The security guards tried to tell us another way to get the shirt to him, but that really was not going to work.  We drove a total of 500 miles to see this show. They just didn't understand.

And dance. Boy did we dance. We seemed to have super springs in our feet that even the people who were front row and center stage did not possess.  I think Jason Mraz appreciated our super spirit for he shot us a few glances of gratitude immediately into the first songs when everyone else just kind of stood there waiting for the "big hits".

He plays center stage and stage left. About 3/4 of the way through the show he approaches stage right with a chair. He began a little dialog about how the shape of the state of Michigan is so awesome because it's like the "high five of America".  He sat down to play a nice mellow tune. This was the opportunity to get that shirt on stage if there ever was one. The security guard denied me access around my row of seats to get closer and told me I was NOT going to give Jason the shirt in my hands. Just another person who did not understand. On to Plan C.

The ladies in the one row blocking us from being immediately in front of Jason agree to let us climb over their seats. Remember the inner 18-year-olds? One of these nice ladies told us that she just bought a bumper sticker with that "Michigan Love" logo the weekend before. We had her vote. Onward and over!

The song was in the last few lines and I got close enough to launch the shirt on the floor right in front of his guitar. Boom! He looks down and studies what has landed before him. As people clap at the end of the song, he picks it up and exclaims to all 15,000 people, "Look, it's a shirt with a high five!" He then looked right at me and said, "Thank you so much!" and did the same in sign language. All of the musicians and band members came out to sing "Hidden Track" right there on stage right while I lifted off to cloud nine. Sorry, there are no photographs of him with the shirt except for below during the "Hidden Track" performance. Right there next to his left foot. I just enjoyed the moment. And it was awesome. Or as any Mraz fan would sing along: A-W-E-S-O-M-E.




But then Jason was suddenly overshadowed. Sorry. He was. Even after all that with the shirt. In that one row of seats in front of us and next to those two nice ladies who let us climb over their seats was a young girl with special needs and her family.  She was obviously wheel chair bound for her dad held her the entire concert and for whatever reason, her wheel chair was not part of the concert landscape. This was a big deal for their family because I noticed her earlier in the concert and there were many photos being taken. I even made eyes with her at one point in the show and told her how happy I was that she was there.  I think I even signed "I love you to her" because I could see such happiness in all of their faces for which I held her fully responsible. She kept reaching back for me and looking at me, smiling. Their family was there enjoying the show because of her. And from what I understand within my own secret society, they were truly there to celebrate.



Jason came out for the encore, and yes, as I said, he was overshadowed as he played for all 15,000 of us. It was his song "I Won't Give Up".  Maybe you've heard it. At first listen, the song sounds like it's just about the dedication of a man to his wife or girlfriend who believes in their relationship, but after listening more, it's wildly interpretive. Here are the lyrics. It's inspiring. The hospital mom inside me heard this song and saw this family all holding hands, swaying and singing (as documented in the above photo) and watched with singularly focused joy for them. She told the 18-year-old to cool her jets and pay attention. The determination it can take to get down the road with a child with special needs can be difficult, but, wow, so worth it. I mean, look at the dad. He's SO happy!

And those people who took our photo with the t-shirt before the concert? They found us afterward in the parking lot and were so excited we actually did it. Jen went back to the M-22 store here in Traverse City and told them of our successful mission. Everyone in the store gave her a high five.

I close with a portion of the lyrics from that last song, "I Won't Give Up" or otherwise titled "Battle Hymn of the Mom Who Has a Child with Special Needs"...

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make

Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use the tools and gifts we got Yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end you're still my friend, at least we did intend for us to work
We didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not
And who I am.

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
Still looking up...

I won't give up on us
God knows I'm tough, He knows
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up...
 
Keep looking up!  We'll have a report on the big 5th birthday coming up in a few weeks as well as Bernie's next echo on October 9 back at Mott. Thanks for reading along.

A new blog update. Click here.

Swiftie Sisters, the Swindler, and a Bedroom Fit for a Teen

Happy World Down Syndrome Day! March 21, 2024 Unlike becoming a parent of neurotypical children, parents of children with Down syndrome must...