Friday, May 8, 2015

A Letter for Bernie's [Kid] Friends

We told Bernie about today being her last day of school last night and that she won't be sleeping in her own bed for a while.  We drew some pictures (Jeff really would have been better to do this as my drawing skills are limited) to explain each day and tried to keep it really simple.  We told her to make sure she says goodbye to her friends and that she won't be going back to school for a long time.

We also wanted to let her know she gets to see her cousins and swim in the hotel pool tonight and tomorrow.  We explained that Monday we would start having sleepovers at the hospital and it will be a while before we are home again together. She did not cry or anything, but did mention the word hospital a couple of times before going to bed. She did not like hearing the word hospital. And that was about it. She walked away from Jeff and I at the couch and went to go play downstairs. I think it was harder for Jeff and I to verbalize everything at this point. Saying goodbye to "Good Boy" this afternoon will probably be pretty hard.

 The good news is that we are getting a better plan together at the hospital as not to poke Bernie every single day leading up to her procedures.  She will be admitted and get a PICC line right away that will allow for her heparin drip and blood draws to happen without poking her.  This will allow her have her arms free before surgery as a PICC line is placed below her left clavicle. Anti-anxiety medication for Bernie will also probably help. This is good news and we hope the placement of this line is smooth.

A letter will go home with the kids in Bernie's class today explaining in more detail what will happen to Bernie at the hospital.

The teacher in me feels it is important to acknowledge appropriate levels of reality and use experiences as teaching tools. 

In case you would like to explain this to your kiddos in a way they can understand, feel free to read it to them, too. We know Bernie has lots of kid friends who aren't all in her class!



Friday, May 8, 2015
Dear K-1 Classmates and Families,

I want you all to know how much Bernie has enjoyed being part of your world at school this year.  She is a girl of fewer words, so on her behalf, I want to thank you for your friendship and for all the giggles, smiles, kind words and deeds, and maybe even some help here and there.  She looks at each and every one of your pictures at home A LOT and is so proud of each of you as she tells me your names and smiles. She loves coming to school to see you all!

Maybe as you have seen Bernie at school, you noticed she has a scar on her chest that may show above her shirt some days.  When Bernie was a baby, she was born with a special heart.  It needed to be fixed by a very skilled doctor 3 times before she turned 1 year old. About one-half of all babies who are born with Down syndrome, what Bernie and Hattie Jo were both born with, have to have their hearts fixed as babies so they can live and grow up with their families.  Hattie Jo was born with a healthy heart. Bernie was not, but we were very lucky to have her surgeries go well and to have a great place to take her to have her heart fixed so she can be with us today!

Next week on Monday, Bernie is going to the hospital again for a while.  One Wednesday, the doctors are going to take some very special pictures of Bernie’s heart by putting a very tiny camera up through one of her veins in her thigh. She is going to have her 4th heart surgery on Thursday, May 14.  The doctors will have to open her scar up again and fix a problem going on in her heart. We have to go early on Monday because she takes medicine every day to keep her special heart working right and it will take a couple days for the medicine to come out of her body so she can have the surgery and the special pictures taken.  She will have to get a lot of pokes and is probably going to be very sad. We are really glad the doctors also have great medicine that will keep Bernie from feeling any pain during her surgery.  She will get some medicine to help her sleep and have a machine that will help her breathe called a ventilator.  She will not know what happened to her when she wakes up, but she will probably not feel very good.  It may take a while for her to breathe without a machine and walk around again.

We don’t know how long we will be gone in Ann Arbor.  Bernie does not like going to the hospital and gets scared when we are there. If everything goes really well, we could be home by the end of the month of May, but we could be there all summer. We just don’t know. We will be there as long as it takes for her to get better. Bernie will probably not be back at school until next fall when we come back to school in September. 

In case you want to send Bernie a letter, draw her a picture, or send her something (she LOVES photos!) to cheer her up, I want you to have our hospital address.  Here it is:


Bernice Carson Smith (patient)
University of Michigan's Mott Children's Hospital
Michigan Congenital Heart Center
1540 E Hospital Drive
Ann Arbor, MI 48109

If you want to hear about how Bernie is doing after her surgery, we have a couple of places you can check on the Internet: Our care page and blog.  You can leave messages there, too. Here are those addresses if you and your mom or dad can use the computer together: 


Thank you all for being good friends and we will really be looking forward to seeing you all when we get home.  

Your friend, 

Mrs. Smith/Missy Smith (Bernie’s Mom)

P.S. Bernie wanted you to have this special collection of pictures of her fun memories at school this year with all of you.  We will be keeping our copy of it at the hospital and think of you often! If you have any questions, make a list with Ms. Melissa and I will do my best to answer them for you to help you better understand what’s going on and how you can keep being a good friend to Bernie.




 

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